Brain Farts

Pondering.

I sat there for a good twenty minutes pondering . . . racking the brain trying to recall the name of a bird species.  Though I knew, I could not remember its name.  Twenty minutes!

 

Crane?  No, sort of looks like one.  Egret?  No, sort of looks like one.  I just could not think of the name of the bird I was thinking of.  Frustrating!  It’s a bird I am always on the lookout whenever I go critter creeping.  For the life of me I could not think of the bird’s name.  It was like it was on the tip of my tongue refusing to reveal itself.

 

There are over 400 species of birds in Montana.  It is no big deal if a person cannot recall a bird’s name from time to time . . . my goodness!  There are over 400 avian species . . . 400!  But still, this is a fairly common bird in my avian vernacular. 

 

So . . . I pondered.

 

Then, while sitting in the throne room . . . it happened!  Out of nowhere it appeared.  The name . . . Heron, Great Blue Heron.  That was it!  That was the name of the bird I was thinking about.  It was such a sweet relief to remember.  With shaky confidence, I assured myself that I was not losing it . . . yet!

 

I’m at that age when a simple thing like remembering the name of a bird becomes a concern.  Especially today with all the social media and the attention it focuses on older adults and their health scares . . . I mean “concerns”.  Especially things like dementia and Alzheimer’s.  Memory or lack of seems to be a big issue when it comes concerns older adults.  Of which I am one.  My little episode sparked my concern, worry, and anxiety that I might be losing my mind . . . or at least my memory.

 

The symptoms of dementia are progressive.  They start out slowly and gradually get worse over time.  Things like experiencing memory difficulties.  Changes in the way one thinks.  Difficulty in completing common tasks.  Visual and spatial issues.  Decreased or poor judgment.  Withdrawal from activities.  Changes in mood and personality.  The advice is to see a doctor as soon as possible once these symptoms occur.

 

Being susceptible to the vast knowledge of information from the reliable and trustworthy Internet and social media . . . it’s no wonder the alarm my mind was blasting away when I couldn’t remember that the name of the bird was Heron.  Twenty minutes!  Surely, I was in the grasp of dementia or at least tiptoeing into it.  Honestly, I was more upset about being declared in the realm of dementia that I was about not being able to identify a bird.  After all, I am no spring chicken.  I am at that age when everyone is more concerned about my health than they are about me.  Sometimes it feels like I am a living (maybe dying) specimen under a microscope with family and friends. They tell me, “You’re at that age.”

 

For the record: I do not have dementia.  Though some might think struggling for twenty minutes for the name of a bird might constitute a issue of memory loss.  I assure you, it is not!  At least not in my case.  No, it was a “brain fart”.  A brain fart is “a temporary mental lapse, characterized by sudden forgetfulness, confusion, or a brief inability to think clearly.”  These lapses are normal.  They are everyday cognitive blips.  They are not signs of serious impairment.  It is not dementia.  It is a brain fart.

 

Lots of things can cause brain farts.  Stress and fatigue overloading the brain.  The “doorway effect” or the passing into a new environment causing the brain to do a cleanse and remove previous, unnecessary information making a person forget why they entered.  Of the drain drops into autopilot or routine failing to register changes.  The result?  Brain fart.  It is a temporary failure of the brain’s usual efficiency.

 

For a person closer to 70 than 50, my memory is good.  True, I’m lousy at putting names with faces and recalling names.  “Hey you!” works for me.  There are a lot of people I know as “Hey you!”  I have no difficulties solving problems or making plans.  I complete daily tasks though maybe not as fast as my wife would like.  I do not get confused with time or place except when it comes to Daylight Savings.  That always messes me for a couple of days.  No issue with my vision when it comes to visual images and spatial relationships. I have always seen the world cock-eyed.  I’ve always been what my mother called “graceful”.  It was her kind way and sarcastic way of calling me a klutz.  I’ll admit that there are times when I have frustration with speaking or writing . . . coming up with the “right” words, but I also have the Internet—a source of many words!  I don’t misplace things.  I lose my mind occasionally, but I usually find it.  I’ve never been one esteemed for my judgment, but it is fairly decent and reliable.  When it comes to withdrawal from social activities, come on!  I am an introvert!  Enough said.  When it comes to changes in moods and personality . . . hmmmmm . . . I think I’m normal, after all I am human.  Everyone knows how quirky humans can be.

 

On a scale of one to ten dementia symptoms, I probably score a one or one-and-a-half.

 

There you have it.  I am nowhere close to having dreaded dementia.  I’m just a brain farting old guy who might be a little off.  Others might say that I am demented, but I do not have dementia.  At least not today.  Just a brain fart . . . a simple mental lapse thanks to that damn Heron.  It happens.