Welcome to Big Old Goofy World . . . a place where I can share my thoughts, hopes, and dreams about this rock that we live on and call home.

Thursday, March 22, 2012

Venus Kicks Mars Butt

Just about every day I am reminded that women do many things better than men.  I work in an office with ten women--I am the only male in the office.  Trust me, I know my place.  Experience, though, is not the only evidence I need to understand that women do many things better than men . . . no, MSN.com (http://living.msn.com/life-inspired/live-your-dream/slideshow?cp-documentid=32497722#1) shared a story from Cosmopolitan magazine about a recent study that states this fact.  The story lists ten things that women do better than men.  Shoot, they could have asked me and I could have told them that there are hundreds of things that women do better than men!

According to the article, women are evolving hotter than men.  Now if the article was referring to body temperature I might have argued, but it was referring to looks.  The article states that through evolution women have gotten better looking than men through the generations, while men have basically remained the same in the looks department.  I am not sure as to the reason why this happens, maybe it was because men were so good looking the women had to catch up--but I am probably wrong on that account.  The bottom line is that women are getting better looking while we men are struggling to hang onto what we got.

Women survive car accidents more often than men.  At first this one floored me . . . it floored me because of all the women I have driven by who were multitasking when I drove by.  I have seen women eating, applying make-up, talking on the cell phone, and fiddling with the radio--all at once!  I guess if you are distracted enough an accident wouldn't even phase you.  I guess if we men were not rubber necking at all the women while we were driving we probably would avoid more accidents, and thus survive more of them.  I also think that we men are more adventurous and risk-taking than women--especially here in Montana during the winter.  We have four-wheel drive and we can go anywhere!  Boys never grow up!

Women are better at seeking comfort--DUH!  When there is a problem men react without thinking.  We pound the crud out of whoever is making us uncomfortable and then ask, "Do you understand now?"  Women are more apt to talk about their problems and what is stressing them.  Men . . . well, we get into cars, drive fast, have accidents, and hope we survive.  Women, nearly two-to-one, talk their problems out.  Most men would never admit they had a problem as they kick the dog.

Women are more recession proof than men.  In this recent men have suffered the greatest loss--80 percent of the jobs that were canned were jobs men had.  The article suggested that maybe men needed to start working in those fields that have been traditionally been seen as women's careers--jobs like teaching and nursing.  After a couple of years of doing professional development for teachers--and being a man--I can honestly say that teaching is not an area I would want to go into.  I am not tough enough . . . teaching is tough.  Women are tougher than men, I will give them that because it is true.  Hey, they have to put up with men.  Nursing . . . it involves needles.  I don't like needles.  Enough said.

Notice anything wrong with the picture above?  There is no male in the picture.  There is no male in the picture because women graduate from college more often than men.  Now this might be because there are more women in college, but the study showed that despite that more women actually finish their college degrees.  Also, they take less time in doing so.  Now from personal experience I will put my college and graduate school record up against any woman as far as graduating and graduating on time . . . but I did notice, even in seminary, that there sure were a lot of women standing around me as we graduated.  Women are smart . . . they are hard working . . . and they take this stuff a lot more serious than men do.

In the picture above I see lunch . . . with the wife and the women I work with this is nothing more than a heart attack waiting to happen.  Women eat healthier than men.  I can attest to that.  In fact, I am reminded of this on a daily basis.  At work the women marvel in disgust at what I eat . . . at home the wife reminds me that I need to eat healthier.  Women want to live a long time, I just a good meal that tastes good.  I just want to live.  They all look good, I have the northern hemisphere migrating south.  There is no doubt that women eat healthier than men . . . but you know until they make a yogurt that tastes like prime rib . . .

Women have stronger immune systems.  They handle illness better than men.  Men are babies when they get sick.  Me, well, when I get sick I just want to crawl off and die in privacy.  I don't want to hear the lecture that if I only ate better, took better care of myself, drove slower . . . yada, yada, yada . . . from the wife.  It is a quicker and less painful death to just crawl into the bedroom and die.  But the article states that women have a secret weapon that allows them to be less impervious to illness--estrogen.  We men are lacking in the estrogen department, but my understanding is that age equals this one out.  This, though, carries with it a whole new set of circumstances that shortens the lives of most men--menopause!  I think I had better stop while I am ahead on this one.

Women live longer than men . . . obviously this is true for various reasons.  The article states that women live five to ten years longer than men.  My flippant response--and what is most obvious to men--is that it is because women don't have to live with men.  Now, having said that, I suspect that the majority of the women in my life will take offense to that and let me know.  In their letting me know I will lose at least five years of my life expectancy.  Again, this is probably due to the fact we men are adventurous and risk takers who don't know when to keep our mouths shut!  Remember, women have less accidents, eat healthier, have better immune systems, and are not afraid of dealing with their problems.  Men, well . . . oh, look!  A pretty ball!

Women are better managers especially in today's economy.  No arguments from me in this department.  I am amazed on a daily basis at how well the office I work in runs . . . and, trust me, it sure has very little to do with me.  Women are better listeners, problem solvers, and multitaskers than men.  Shoot, they handle everything better than men.  Once again, from personal experience, I am in awe of the women in my life and at how well they handle life.

And, lastly, women are better investors than men.  The financial portfolios of women out-perform the portfolios of men by a two-to-one margin.  On this one I plead the fifth amendment--or is the fifth of Jack Daniels--as the wife always has the checkbook.  I do have to admit that the wife can stretch a dollar a lot further than I ever could . . . men and money seem to be soon departed.  Women are more cautious about their investments.  We men are more apt to buy a fast car, drive recklessly, and have an accident.  Women survive more accidents than men . . . obviously, then, they are going to have better portfolios than men.

Now I do not put much stock in the validity of Cosmopolitan magazine when it comes to scientific studies about men and women.  It is not coming out of a leading research university or think tank, but I cannot dispute their findings.  My experience is that women pretty much kick the butts of men . . . I know because my wife has told me . . . the ten women I work with have told me.  Who am I to argue with the authorities?

Men and women are wired differently.  I see and experience this on a daily basis.  The women in my life remind me of this on a daily basis.  I guess I was a "mamma's boy" growing up, and my mamma taught me that if "mamma wasn't happy ain't no body happy."  Because of that I have a healthy respect for the women in my life.  They bring to me a dimension that magnifies and makes my life that much better.  I appreciate the women in my life as they make my life better.  I've got to . . . I've got to because I will never be able to beat them!  It is better to love them than to sit in the proverbial dog house.  Besides, this is what a woman told me:

That probably explains why women kick the butts of men.  Whatever the case, as I stated earlier, I appreciate and love the women in my life.  God has blessed me abundantly in that area . . .

Thank God for women . . . where would we men be without them!

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