Wondering

Wondering is mental wandering.  I like to wonder . . . I like to ponder . . . And, I have been known to wander.  It is always an adventure that leads to who knows where.  Usually nowhere important.  As I get older wondering and wandering is how I get most of my exercise—mentally and physically.

Some of my recent wondering:

 

--How come no one puts raisins in brownies?  My family made faces and laughed when I suggested this.  Raisinets—chocolate covered raisins—are the third-largest selling candy in the United States history.  It makes sense . . . chocolate brownies . . . raisins.  The best of both worlds.  All I get is laughter . . . yet, I wonder.

 

--How come they put turn signals on motor vehicles since no one seems to use them?

 

--Why do church signs proclaim, “all are welcomed” and Sunday mornings are the most segregated time in during the week?

 

--Does the hair I lose through balding migrate to other parts of my body?  Parts where I don’t want it . . . like my ears, nose, and back.  Or is this just hair that is late bloomers?

 

--According to research, picking one’s nose is the number one activity for people while driving.  How come they never report the number of accidents caused by nose-picking but for everything else?  I imagine that looking at one’s cell phone while driving has bumped nose-picking as the number one activity while driving.  Imagine the number of accidents that would happen if people did both while driving.  Just wondering.

 

--Why do I always find a better deal on a product right after I purchase it?

 

--How come companies that sell potting soil don’t charge extra for all those pesky little flying gnats that spring to life once the bag is open?  Is it a perk?

 

--Why is it that the dogs always have to lay on my side of the bed . . . lay on my pillow?  How come they never lay on the wife’s side or pillow?

 

--How come women can wear pants with the legs that come to their ankles and they are told that they are “cute” and “fashionable”, but if men wear pants like that they are laughed at and made fun of . . . asked, “Where’s the flood?”

 

--Why is it when my grandchildren “toot” it is cute, but if Papa “toots” it is a major offense that clears the room?

 

--Whenever the grandkids visit, Nana’s treasure chest of Barbies is the “go to” toy.  But I have often wondered why—if Barbie is so popular—that we must keep buying her friends?

 

--How come we never ask our doctors where they ranked in their graduating class?  Remember half of them were in the bottom half.

 

--If I get a new car for my spouse, would it be a fair trade?

 

I have discovered that most people don’t appreciate it when I let my mind wander.  I think they see it as a sign of senility.  About the only ones who appreciate it are my grandchildren, but they also enjoy my “dad jokes”. They enjoy my random brain farts . . . most because they think farts are funny.  Whatever . . . it’s great exercise for my mind.  Some elders do crossword puzzles to stay sharp, I wonder.

 

We all do.

 

Some of us just aren’t afraid to admit it.  I wonder as I wander . . . but I always make it home.  I always leave the light on.  Of course, that doesn’t always mean that there is anyone at home.  That is a risk one takes when wondering.