Welcome to Big Old Goofy World . . . a place where I can share my thoughts, hopes, and dreams about this rock that we live on and call home.

Wednesday, April 30, 2014

You Know Who You Are

I recently stumbled upon a bunch of quotes that came under the heading, 30 Thoughts That Every Introvert Has Had.  If you are an introvert, you will appreciate these quotes.  I am not really sure who the individual was who found all of these, but I imagine that he or she probably banged them out on the computer from the safety of their home . . . alone . . . in a semi-lit room . . . alone.  I felt a kindred spirit to the words and whoever the individual was who shared them.

“Clothes don’t make the man, the ability to stay at home for long periods of time watching Netflix makes the man.”  I am not sure that I agree with this one . . . I don’t watch much of anything (until college football kicks off, and then only the University of Nebraska) on television or my computer.  I agree that “clothes don’t make the man”, I am not much on dressing up . . . I am who I am no matter what I wear.  If I were to wear nice, fancy clothes . . . well, I’d still be an introvert who wears nice, fancy clothes that no one ever sees.  I do like staying at home for long periods of time . . .

“True love is never dropping in unexpected.”  I hate it whenever someone drops in to the homestead unexpectedly.  I am not prepared.  I haven’t take anything to dull the pain yet.  Makes me anxious.  Usually I stand at the door (screen door still closed) and talk to the invaders . . . usually small talk and “what do you want?” talk.  The wife, who is an extravert, stands behind me poking me to let them in . . . it is party time!  Not me . . . if you want to be my friend, do not drop by unexpectedly . . . call first . . . at least a week in advance.  Give me time to get ready for the invasion.

“You can lead a horse to water, but you cannot make him socialize with the other horses.”  Ask the wife . . . she will verify this one.  Ask the people I work with at the university . . . they will verify it too.  They all know that if there is somewhere to go with a lot of people I do not know . . . well, the bubbly, vivacious John they all know and love won’t be there.  He will be hiding in some corner hoping like hell that no one comes near him to start a conversation.  You might take me to the party, but I sure won’t be remembered as being the life of the party . . . odds are I won’t even be remembered.

I had to laugh at this one: “The only problem with seeing people you know is that they know you.”  People who know me . . . well, they can’t just say “hi” and move on . . . noooooooooooooooooo, they want to stop and speak.  Just what any introvert wants to do.  Now, I was raised to be cordial and greet people when I pass them . . . you know, things like “hi” or “how are you” . . . just being nice.  Why is it when I am being nice to people they think that it is an invitation to talk?  I am learning to walk with my head down . . . or, if I see someone I know before they see me, I cross to the other side of the street or duck into an alley.

“Misery loves company, so avoid people.”  I don’t know too many people who enjoy misery . . . and, it seems that whenever two or three people are gathered, someone spills the milk.  Misery ensues.  As an introvert it seems that it is best to just avoid people . . . avoid small talk, but mostly avoid people.  Which doesn’t really bother introverts because we know: “You can never be truly bored, so long as you have yourself for company.”  Hey, I am my own best friend . . . and, I like myself most of the time.  Life couldn’t get any better . . .

The reality, though, is that short of being a hermit, you cannot avoid people.  Seems that there are people everywhere a person goes . . . even in Montana!  This is a sad fact that we introverts have to accept . . . no matter how hard we attempt to avoid people, people are going to be a part of our lives.  We introverts have come to accept the fact that “No man is an island, unfortunately.”   Thus we introverts put a whole lot of stock in our instincts to weed out those people who we do not like . . . do not want to hang out with . . . and, it is a tedious and long process that takes a while . . . a long while.  It would be nice if we could like people from the first time that we meet them, but that is asking a lot.  As one of the quotes stated: “Liking a person on the first go is the closest thing there is to a miracle.”  As an introvert I have not experienced too many miracles when it came to liking people at the first meeting.

“In unity there is anxiety.”  Crowds make me anxious . . . can’t control them . . . they are unpredictable . . . and, they invade my space, trample on my privacy, lay waste to my little kingdom.  Now, I am all for one and one for all, but on my terms.  Because I don’t like crowds I do not enjoy going to the movies . . . movies are like going to the stockyard and being herded into the theater.  I want to “moo”.  So, I take the advice in the next quote: “When in doubt, don’t go out.”  The wife does not like this one . . . she’ll say, “Let’s go do something” . . . and I will stammer around for hours trying to avoid going out . . . there are lots of days when she just doesn’t even ask.

Of course, people want to know . . . what is that guy’s problem?  Is he a little off course?  Is he anti-social?  No! NO!  I am just an introvert.  As an introvert I get tired of explaining to people what that means . . . over and over again.  I get tired of trying to tell people that it is just a preference.  They don’t get it when I tell them: “It’s not hiding. I’m recharging my creative juices.”  Also, “Less time spent with others, means less time suffering through small talk.”  Small talk kind of cuts into the recharging of creative juices . . . sort of like someone dragging his or her finger nails down a chalk board.  I just don’t understand why people don’t understand it.

I loved this next one because I have often done this dance.  “Get in and get out.  Get in and get out.  Get in and get out.”  It is a dance introverts know well . . . I do it whenever I go to Wally World, the movie theater, restaurants, and any other place where people gather to be social.  It is the introvert’s two-step . . . we just need to put it to music and sell it.  Of course, no one else hears it but the introvert.

There were others, but these are the ones I resonated with the fastest . . . the ones that brought a smile to my face . . . the ones in which I wanted to proclaim, “Heck yes!”  If you are an introvert these quotes will probably resonate with you too.  If you are an extravert . . . well, good luck.  You won’t know what any of them mean; but, being the extravert that you are . . . ask an introvert and they’ll explain it to you.  That is if you can find an introvert.

You know who you are . . . keep quiet, avoid people, and remember, “The best things in life are silent.”   

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