Welcome to Big Old Goofy World . . . a place where I can share my thoughts, hopes, and dreams about this rock that we live on and call home.

Friday, March 21, 2014

Lift Me to Paradise




Good Lord, up above, can't you know I'm pinin'
Tears all in my eyes?
Send down that cloud with a silver linin'
Lift me to Paradise

Show me that river, take me across
And wash all my troubles away
Like that lucky old sun, give me nothin' to do
But roll around Heaven all day

(“That Lucky Old Sun” by Beasley Smith, and Haven Gillespie 1949)

There are days when life is more than any of us can deal with . . . where we are ready to throw the towel in before we even get started.  I had one of those days this past week.  The morning began way too early and with little sleep after our son had spent a night fighting with seizures all night . . . the alarm rang way too soon to announce the start of another day.  Then there was the usual trek to the university through the darkness of the morning with all the other sleep deprived commuters in a winter that just doesn’t want to let go.  Then I was greeted at work by an email telling me that a co-worker in Helena had been killed in an auto accident . . . and, also her son.  Then at lunch in the university cafeteria one of the international students suddenly fell . . . seizures . . . and was hauled off to the nearby hospital by ambulance.  All this and it wasn’t even half-way through the day yet!  I was ready to call it a day.  It is in those moments of being overwhelmed that we roll our eyes to heaven, lift up a prayer, and beg God to “lift us up Paradise.”
Well, here it is . . . five days later . . . and I am still here. I am no closer to ridding my life of all its frustrations, crises, hassles, depressions, mistakes, or hard work and making it to Paradise.  Yet, the prayer is still there.  Now, I know what Mother Teresa said . . . “I know God won’t give me anything I can’t handle.  I just wish he didn’t trust me so much.”  And, I know that the music of the faith is filled with songs and hymns asking God to come and rescue the faithful from a world of woe . . . and, we are still here.  I guess it just feels good to complain whether it is in the words we pray or the songs we sing . . .

Good Lord, up above, can't you know I'm pinin'
Tears all in my eyes?
Send down that cloud with a silver linin'
Lift me to Paradise

Show me that river, take me across
And wash all my troubles away
Like that lucky old sun, give me nothin' to do
But roll around Heaven all day

Like Mother Teresa said, I wish God didn’t trust me so much.  I worry about my son and his battles with Epilepsy . . . it is wearing me out . . . it is wearing us out . . . and, we never seem as if we are ever winning the battle.  It is shocking to receive news about someone you know . . . in their early 40s . . . who you had just communicated with days earlier . . . is suddenly gone because of an accident.  It is scary to witness a stranger fall to the ground, bang their head on a table, and lay motionless while recovering from a seizure before the next one comes.  Pile on top of that the frustrations of work . . . the busyness of life . . . a winter that won’t let go and a spring that won’t fight . . . and, it gets to be a little overwhelming.

Then, as I was driving to the big university to work one morning this week, I heard Louis Armstrong singing That Lucky Old Sun.  Now there is something about ol’ Louie’s raspy voice that always grabs my attention and listen . . . he is one of my favorites.  There in the darkness he lamented the difficulty of life . . . the hard work to make it . . . the boringness of routine . . . trying to make relationships work.  All the while he is looking up at the sun . . . that lucky old sun that has nothing to do but roll around heaven all day.  He longs for that too . . . no worries . . . no cares . . . just to roll around heaven all day.  He pleads to God, “Lift me to Paradise.”  Kind of peculiar that I was hearing this after I threw up my own cryptic prayer of release after a hard day.  Amen, Brother Louie . . . amen!

I guess it is a pretty common prayer.

As I said, I am still here . . . still in Montana.  Guess God figures that Montana is pretty close to Paradise . . . even in the lingering winter . . . and, who am I to argue with God on that one.  I suppose Brother Louie wasn’t yanked up into Paradise when he released this song in 1949 because he was around for a long, long time after its release.  And, I suppose that the majority of those who have thrown that prayer to God didn’t get any closer to Paradise than when they prayed it.  Yeah, I know what the Bible says about asking God for anything in prayer and God will give it to us . . . but, God must have some unwritten parameters that most of us are unaware of . . . the fine print of theology that most of us do not take the time to read.  And, yeah, I know that God will not give us more than we can handle . . . but, God pushes the limits of that promise pretty close.  Maybe God shouldn’t trust us so much.  Plus I know that maybe God is teaching me a “life” or “faith” lesson . . . but I don’t think that I am that ignorant or thick-skulled that it feels like I am on a roller coaster.  So, to be honest with you, I am not going to buy into the ready-made answers of faith that we, the faithful, like to tell ourselves to ease our disappointment that we are not rolling around in heaven with no worries or cares.

Nope, I’m not going to buy it.  I am not going to buy it because I do not believe that Paradise . . . that heaven . . . that the kingdom of God . . . is some destination way up there in the clouds.  Paradise is here . . . right now.  It is wherever I experience the presence of God and God’s love and grace . . . I do not have to wait until I get to heaven to know that presence . . . to know that love and grace.  I know that this is true because I have experienced it for myself.

The co-worker I had known for several years suddenly and shockingly dying in an accident . . . there were others who spoke words of comfort . . . who offered hugs . . . who joined me in my shock.  In the struggle with my son’s Epilepsy . . . I have my wife and together we continue to support one another and our son . . . who have not given up no matter how tired or worn out we get.  With the international student . . . others join me in coming to her aid . . . others cared for her . . . others let her know that she was not alone.  In brief moments of care and support others let me know that I am not alone in this journey through life.  In those brief moments of care . . . and, I suppose love . . . I was reminded that I was not alone.  In those brief moments a crack split the veneer of reality allowing the light to break through the darkness and expose a little piece of Paradise . . . a sliver of holiness . . . the presence of God.  Because of that it is okay that I am still here . . .

There may be those who want to argue with me about the kingdom of God . . . Paradise . . . heaven . . . being here and not off in some far off place, but I am not going to argue.  I am not going to argue because I believe that God is not going to dangle a holy carrot before our faces and lure us into something as wonderful and beautiful as Paradise.  No, I believe God is going to let us have the gift now.  We just have to be open to seeing it, experiencing it, and working for it right now.  Sometimes we are just too busy, sometimes we are overwhelmed with life . . . but the fact is, we have all experienced it . . . in a simple word of encouragement . . . in a smile . . . in a hug . . .

It is a beautiful world.  Though ol’ Louie was a little depressing with his song That Lucky Old Sun, he also reminded us how close we really are to Paradise when he sang What a Wonderful World.  It truly is a wonderful world . . . Paradise.


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