I have blown my chance for good
luck. I have offended God, Jesus, and
probably every other religion and deity in existence (and a few that probably
have even been created yet). I have been
declared unpatriotic . . . a communist, socialist, and every other “ist” there
is . . . because I didn’t “like” a particular post. I have been called mean because I did not
share another person’s post with all of my “friends” out there in
cyberspace. I have become cursed for
life because I did not respond to game requests, share requests, and chat room
pokes. Cursed!!
Only a daily basis I am bombarded with
requests to share, like, participate, and generally be social on Facebook. Each of these comes with passive-aggressive
suggestions of what could happen if I do not participate . . . my luck will run
out . . . God and Jesus will doom to hell for not liking them . . . my prayers will be broken and left hanging out
there in the heavens . . . I will be audited by the Internal Revenue Service
because I did not support our troops by “liking” the 500,000,000th
request to honor our warring warriors . . . I will never be invited to a
birthday party because I forgot to send a birthday message—again, nor will I
ever receive a birthday present because I didn’t click on the link to get the
celebrating person a gift . . . I will be offered a one-way ticket to China by
both the liberals and conservatives because I didn’t “like” their ever-changing
causes . . . and, on and on and on the curse builds. I will probably lose what friends I have on Facebook once they realize that I am
cursed.
But, I am not going to apologize for
my accursed state. I never did join the Facebook Community to actually become a
part of a digital chain letter . . . nor, did I join Facebook to be social—remember I am an introvert. We introverts don’t need lots of people or
friends in our lives to be validated . . . we have all of our imaginary friends
running around in our minds! I did not
join Facebook to participate in the
games that one can play with their friends . . . ask my family and they will
tell you that I do not like playing games.
So, if I don’t play games with my own family, what in the world makes
you think that I want to play games with anyone else! No, I am not going to apologize and seek
forgiveness from the cyberspace gods . . . I have already offended them . . .
it is too late.
Thus it is that I have to deal with
the consequences of my choices. I lose
my luck . . . I get sent to hell . . . I offend all of our founding fathers . .
. I break the chain . . . I miss out on my chance for a million, billion
dollars . . . and, my prayers are thrown away.
I am branded “unsociable” . . . Facebook
probably has put some sort of tracer on my account that is fed into the federal
government that rings a bell in Washington, D.C. every time I ignore a request
on my newsfeed page. I imagine that they
are probably tired of that darn bell ringing all of the time. But, hey, it is my choice to be cursed.
I joined Facebook like many in my generation . . . to keep tabs on what my
children were doing . . . again, probably another reason that I am cursed. But, over the years, I have come to see Facebook as a tool. Primarily I use the social network to share
my photographs that I like to take . . . I use it to share information with my
congregation on their page . . . I use it to share my blog (again, probably
another curse creator in my life). I may
be an introvert, but I still like to throw stuff out that has been floating
around in my rock garden for a while. Plus,
I only have to put it out there once and not have to repeat it over and over
again. This is a BIG plus for us
introverts. On the other hand, I do not
use Facebook to further a political
cause . . . or religious cause . . . social justice cause . . . sporting cause
(though I sometimes come close with my love for the Nebraska Cornhuskers) . . .
or any cause. Because I don’t use Facebook that way, I would like to be
shown some respect by others and not have them do that to me.
I realize though, that I am cursed . .
. I will never find that respect. I have
been offending the cyberspace gods for way too long by not participating in
their rituals of redundancy and boredom.
In the thirty minutes I have spent lamenting my accursedness, I have received
another twenty requests to “like” or “share” or “participate” on my news feed .
. . the creator of Facebook is
laughing sinisterly at me as he walks to the bank . . . I am cursed!!! Click on “like” if you agree . . . or, beware
the curse!
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