So Many Colors . . .

Both the wife and I are pastors.  We are pastors in a denomination that believes and preaches diversity . . . the need for congregations to be diverse.  Both of us would be quick to admit that since we entered the ministry over thirty years ago, our denomination has done a remarkable job at becoming more diverse . . . or at least attempting to be diverse.  We recently were having a conversation about how churches have preached and begun to embrace diversity.  We remarked at how much the “church” has shifted in welcoming people of different colors, races, cultures, and sexualities into the fellowship.  We nearly broke our arm patting ourselves on the back at the success we have been a part of . . . and, it is true . . . our denomination has become more diverse . . . after all, a lot of our congregations in the denomination have an unofficial motto of “all are welcome.”

At least on the surface it appears that we are beginning to get this diversity thing down; but, I am not too sure.

On the surface I think that we are trying really hard to accept people who are different from us . . . different in the way that they look, different in the culture they come from, different in the way dress, different in the way that they express their sexuality . . . it is a form of acceptance of differences, but in the end, I think that we—the “church”—are still missing the boat.  I don’t think we are as diverse as we might look. Yes, the “church” has begun to remove the physical barriers that separate us . . . color, race, culture, and sexuality . . . but, the reality is that the congregations we worship in are not as diverse as we think they are.  They may look diverse, but when it comes to living one’s faith . . . well, I think that most congregations are still pretty homogenous.  We may look different, but we think a lot alike when it comes to our faith.  When it comes to congregational theology, we are not too diverse.

The bottom line in life is that people are different.  People look different.  People also think differently . . . primarily because of the same reasons we have those difference in visual and physical diversity . . . we are raised differently . . . live in different cultures . . . so, why wouldn’t we think differently?  Yet, I have rarely encountered a congregation that was not pretty homogenous when it came to their faith and theology.  Even more eye-opening was that undercurrent that expected people to believe and think in the same way.  I say “undercurrent” because it is not consciously expressed, but it is there none the less . . . present in non-verbal cues . . . present in the silence.  I think that churches and congregations have learned to accept those who look and act differently, but struggle with those who think differently. 

Thinking differently . . . believing differently . . . it is all a part of being diverse.  Yet, I think that the “church” fails at this level of diversity . . . fails to the point that it is killing the “church”.

It is sad when the diversity of thought dies.  Many years ago, singer/songwriter Harry Chapin sang to this idea in a song titled Flowers are Red.  In this song a young child is coloring in his kindergarten class . . . coloring away and using every crayon color in the box . . . colors everywhere!  The problem was that it was not time for art . . . after being reprimanded the teacher told him he was wrong in his coloring:

She said, "It's not the time for art young man

And anyway flowers are green and red"

"There's a time for everything young saw

And a way it should be done

You've got to show concern for everyone else

For you're not the only one"

And she said, "Flowers are red young man

And green leaves are green

There's no need to see flowers any other way

Than they way they always have been seen"

Of course the child disagreed:

But the little boy said

"There are so many colors in the rainbow

So many colors in the morning sun

So many colors in the flower and I see every one"

Being a child . . . well, the child bends to the teacher’s way of thinking.  Bends so that he can fit into and be a part of the class . . . to avoid being lonely and left out.

Eventually the child moves to another town . . . begins a new school.  At the new school the teacher is different . . . tells the children to color away . . . use every color; but the child cannot do it . . . he replies:

"Flowers are red, and green leaves are green

There's no need to see flowers any other way

Than the way they always have been seen"

I think that there are many who have grace the doors of many churches and congregations to experience the same sort of reception to their coloring outside of the lines . . . of considering all the colors of the rainbow . . . of thinking for themselves.  I think that they are the ones out there identifying themselves as the “spiritual but not religious” . . . those on the outside longing for the fellowship of God’s family, but finding no way to be welcomed because they think differently . . . think outside of the homogenous boundaries found in most churches and congregations.  And, that is where I think that the “church” is failing the diversity test . . . failing it miserably.

Oh, we give it a lot of lip service . . . but, we fail.

If we are going to truly be the family of God . . . we have got to embrace diversity completely . . . we have to accept it all . . . not only the way that people look and act, but also the way that they think.  It is one thing to say that all people are welcome at the table for the meal, but it takes a little more effort to want to sit at the table and actually relation to one another . . . to talk . . . to dialogue . . . to learn and grow . . . to come into conversation . . . to hear.  It is to want the best for one another . . . isn’t that what love is all about?  Wanting the best for the other?

Over the years, as a pastor, I have come to realize that my role in the process of faith is not to try and sale people a “package” . . . a “one size fits all” package; but, it is to assist people in discovering their own relationship with the God who created and loves them for who they are.  My role is to be a companion on the journey, not the trail boss.  Because of that I ask more questions than give answers . . . I discuss more than act definitive . . . enter into conversation.  I have found that it is in the conversation that the answers are discovered . . . not for me, but for others.  As a pastor it is arrogant to think that I have all the answers and the only way.  Hey, there are so many colors in the rainbow and I want to discover every one.  Pastors should be open to the Spirit in its many forms and shapes and movements.  Pastor should learn to accept diversity not only in the way that people look and act, but also in the way that they think.

I am sure that to some this sounds like blasphemy . . . but, is it?  Or is it just another way of thinking?  Is it diversity?

Someone once said that “united we stand, divided we fall.”  The whole story of God is one towards restoring the family . . . of bringing all of creation back into relationship with God and one another . . . of accepting who we are in the face of God and one another . . . of being that diverse gift of life God meant us to be . . . of being family.  There are so many colors . . . shouldn’t we want to experience and know every one?  There will be no Kingdom of God until we can truly embrace diversity in its wholeness . . . in its holiness.

We All Want to Belong

One of the big stories this past week had to do with Facebook and its move to be more inclusive of the various genders of people signing up for or using their accounts.  In the past there were basically two options . . . male or female.  Now people will have more than the two options . . . they will now have fifty different options to choose from to explain their gender.  That's right . .. fifty!  That is quite a list of choices of which I found myself hard-pressed to know the meaning of a good portion of them after checking them out for myself.  I did not realize that there were so many different words or phrases that could define one's gender or gender choice.  Now Facebook has gone this route to be . . . well, more inclusive . . . and, to allow people who do not fit into the so-called normal definitions of gender to let others know who they really are. Of course, as with any change that Facebook does, this move has brought more than its fair share of complaints and jokes.  The jokes have been the worse because they make fun of an issue that is apparently important and vital to a group of people who do not feel included and accepted for who they are.  Such humor is cruel and insensitive.

I am all for inclusion.  I believe that God is for inclusion . .. after all, we are all God's children created in the image of God . . . and, God would love for us to be one big happy family.  So . . . I am for inclusion.  I think everyone should be loved and accepted for who God create them to be . . . no exceptions to the rules.  I don't think that it matters what gender, race, age, ability or disability, nationality, income level, educational level, or even the size of someone's feet . . . everyone should be invited to the party.  Yet, as much as I am for inclusion, the sad reality is that all of us still live in a pretty exclusive world where not everyone is welcome.  If everyone was welcome, then there would be no need for such things as a list of fifty words to help assist us in defining our gender.

I think that the most basic human need is acceptance . . . to be accepted for who God created us to . . . to be accepted for who we are . . . to be loved and respected . . . and, to be fully included in this thing that we call life.  I think that is what we spend most of our lives looking for . . . those people, places, organizations, and groups that receive us, embrace us, and allow us to be a part of the whole.  We want to belong.  One of my favorite all-time comedies has always been Cheers.  It was that sitcom about a sports bar in Boston where the bar crowd seemed to be like a big family in which everyone was invited to the party and accepted for who they were.  I loved the song . . .

Making your way in the world today takes everything you've got.

Taking a break from all your worries, sure would help a lot.

Wouldn't you like to get away?

Sometimes you want to go

Where everybody knows your name,

and they're always glad you came.

You wanna be where you can see,

our troubles are all the same

You wanna be where everybody knows

Your name.

You wanna go where people know,

people are all the same,

You wanna go where everybody knows

your name.

Isn't that what everyone wants . . . to be accepted and included for who God created them to be?  Isn't that inclusion?

I would love to emphatically state that the "church" is such a place of inclusion . . . but, it is not.  We all know that it is not . . . yet, at the same time, we would love for it to become that place of inclusion.  And, why shouldn't it be?  After all we are the religion that is based on love . . . love of God . . . love of others.  We are the religion that is based on drawing circles that bring all in and not exclude anyone.  We are the religion that claims to speak out for those who are on the outside looking in . . . seeking peace and justice.  So, why shouldn't it be a place of inclusion?

I have often been told by those who attend the "church" that they attend because they feel like they belong.  Isn't that the reason any of us attend a particular church . . . because we feel as if we belong . . . because we are included . . . because someone knows who we are . . . someone knows our name.  I am thankful for the opportunity each Sunday morning to be able to come and worship with a group of people who know my name . . . it is a good feeling to be accepted and included . . . even though, and I realize this, I am the minister.  It is a good feeling to be accepted for who I am . . . to be called by my name . . . and, to be included not because of my gender, education, race, wealth or non-wealth, abilities or disabilities, but because of who I am as created by God.  I like that feeling and I want others to have it too.

Inclusion . . . that is what God desires . . . inclusion.  Inclusion begins where we are as individuals as we look at own lives . . . who is not at the table that should be at the table (ours and God's).  Inclusion grows beyond ourselves to desire to have others in the family with us.  It won't ever be accomplished by creating a nifty list of adjectives to describe ourselves to other . . . though that might be seen as being at least a start.  It begins opening ourselves and our hearts . . . just as God has done for us . . . to allow others to come to the party . . . to take their rightful place at the table (ours and God's).  It begins by learning names.  How biblical is that!